Nunez Memo

R: “Lets extend surveilance of US citizens without warrants for another 6 years."
D: “Isn’t that unconstitutional?"
R: “Don’t care. There’s bad dudes!"
(a week later)
R: “A US citizen got surveiled!"
D: “Didn’t you want to stop bad dudes?"
R: “Not if they work for the White House!"
D: “How did you find out?"
R: “We had FBI surveiled."
D: “Isn’t that illegal?"
R: “Don’t care. There’s deep state!"
D: “Didn’t you just vote to let deep state spy on us? Oh well, lets see who can help us get the deep state back under control."
R: “No need, we already wrote this memo that says White House got framed!"
D: “Are you just distracting us from the Russia investigation?"
R: “What Russia investigation?"
D: “We promised Justice Department we would not release sensitive info on Russia to the world."
R: “Don’t care."
D: “How can we work with our intelligence agencies after we spill their intelligence like that?"
R: “White House said we should just fire everyone who isn’t loyal to our Party."
D: “Can we share a memo on what we think about this with the House?"
R: “Sure. But lets first release our memo. We already talked with FBI."
D: “Did FBI approve releasing this?"
R: “La-la-la… Can’t hear you!"
D: “Will you redact the classified bits?"
R: “La-la-la…"
D: “Lets ask Justice Department and FBI what bits are classified."
R: “We don’t trust them."
D: “Lets find an intelligence expert we trust."
R: “La-la-la…"
D: “Lets wait until we at least talk to them."
R: “No, we’ll release it now."
D: “Wait a minute. Did White House tell you to write this memo?"
R: “So what? We’re releasing it now."
D: “Can we release our memo, too?"
R: “No-no, that would be careless handling of classified bits!”

I kid you not, this is literally how these conversations went, all I did was condense it down to short words.